[Just outside, I saw her. She had a gun, it was the same gun my dad hid all those years ago for self-defense. I showed her where it was because we left it in his memory, I trusted her enough to understand what the true meaning of it is, and why it was there. She understood all of it. Now, I'm witnessing a suicide, My mind is going crazy, its in a whirlpool full of emotions. As I'm filled with panic and adrenaline, I yelled, got up, and I ran as fast as I could. I got out the door, I rushed towards her. Then, I heard a gunshot, I saw it happen with my own two eyes. She committed suicide right in front of me. I'm in a state of shock, hands over my mouth. I start hyperventilating. I'm shaking. What just happened? I was standing there for a couple of seconds. Realization sets in, and I start yelling at the dead of night.]

OH GOD.

OH MY GOD, SHE'S DEAD.

SHIT, SHIT, SHIT!

MOM! MOM! SHE SHOT HERSELF, SHE'S DEAD! I SAW HER THROUGH THE WINDOW. I RAN OUT AS FAST AS I COULD.

OH MY GOD, WHY AM I SO FUCKING STUPID!?!? I SHOULD'VE NEVER LET HER OUT BY HERSELF. GOD FUCKING DAMN IT.

[I was blaming myself for it, I wasn't quick enough, I could've been quicker, I could've been faster, but the heat of the moment was just too much for my mind to handle, especially when so much happened to me before this. This was just too much for my little mind to handle, I couldn't understand what was going on. I was calling out to my mom during the time, she ended up coming out of the house and she also saw what happened. She was also in shock as I was, but she was focusing on me, trying to calm me down. She knew what I was already going through, and she was trying to help me, but I just could not stop shaking and yelling.]

God, please calm down! Please. God, I- I get this is stressful, I'm stressed too, but... just pl-

DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN, I SAW HER DO IT, I COULD'VE JUST RAN FASTER, BUT I WAS JUST TOO FUCKING SLOW!!!

Honey, p- please. Control yourself, control your breathing.

God... WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY ANYTHING TO ME, LEAH?? I COULD'VE JUST... BEEN THERE BUT...

[My eyes were fogged up with tears, I finally stopped yelling, I started to cry uncontrollably, I fell on my knees, leaning back with my head down, with tears dripping down my face. Leah is gone. She was always so happy around me, she was just so kind. What was I missing? Was she trying to make me not worry about her? Did she not want us to worry about whats been going on with her? My mom was patting me on the back, trying to comfort me. I kept crying, out of breath. Then I let out one last yell.]